It’s Dreamgirls with a hint of the Tina Turner story plus dead Whitney Houston. The costumes are fabulous, the songs are OK, the acting is subpar and the directing was just ridiculous. Am I glad I didn’t pay to see this movie? Yes.
First, we’ll talk about Whitney Houston, as this was the last thing she did before she OD’d and drowned in the bathtub. She was a legend, but it’s very apparent in the movie that she lost it years ago. She was dead already behind her eyes.It’s very sad. But it was very funny when she accidentally did the robot during her church solo.
Next, the title star- Jordin Sparks in her big film debut. Her character, Sparkle (but she’s not a hooker?), is a singer/songwriter who is mostly too shy to sing her songs herself, but then is perfectly capable of being a sisters group with her sister Sister (seriously) and sister Dolores.
Her little churchmouse act is pretty good, but I would not say her acting is anything like her singing, because her singing is fantastic. She also looked amazing. After seeing the costumes she wears, i did not wonder why she lost so much weight. She looks great! Her finale gave me chills and a tear on my eye, along with it being the only redeeming scene in the film. You go, Jordin!
Next, Sister. Her name is Sister? Her name IS Sister! Oh well. She is actress Carmen Ejogo, and the whole time I was thinking “who is she and where has she been??” It turns out she has been in some stuff, like someone in “Away We Go” and a “Law and Order” episode or something, but she was absolutely amazing in the film. First, she is drop dead GORGEOUS, her acting was the best in the movie (that might not be saying much compared to what I’ve already written, but she is very very good), and her singing was gorgeous just like her face.
The guys in the movie were pretty good. The manager, Stix, the unctuous rich guy, Satin Struthers, the hot but poor ex, Levi, the albino black guy in Satin’s posse, and the little T-Rex, I mean, Cee-lo Green. His name is on the poster but he’s only in the movie for like a minute, so don’t get too excited.
In conclusion, it takes talent to make domestic abuse and homicide look humorous, but director Salim Akil manages to make that happen.
Also, I don’t care who you are, but black hair in the 1960s was NOT that flat and straight.
SPARKLE hits theatres on Friday, Aug. 17, 2012. It’s rated PG-13 for mature thematic content involving domestic abuse and drug material, and for some violence, language and smoking. It is 1 hour and 56 minutes long.
So what do I think?
It just wasn’t that good. I would not pay $12 to see this.
What do you think?
Watch the trailer: